What’s next after you say “I need to see a family lawyer…”?

Your guide to your first appointment with a family lawyer

In times of uncertainty, information is reassuring and empowering.  And so, we give you this, your guide to a first appointment with a family lawyer.  We offer this to help you manage one of the early steps of life after separation.

Take that first step!

So, the first step is making an appointment to see us (your friendly family lawyer).  You can do this online or by phoning whichever of our offices is closest to you – we have 13 offices across SA, WA and the NT.

We understand that making contact with a lawyer could be a leap into the unknown for you.  Are lawyers like they are on TV?  Am I going to find myself in an episode of Suits/The Lincoln Lawyer/Law and Order?  Is this the twilight zone? How do lawyers know about being human?  Can family lawyers read a balance sheet? Rest assured – our lawyers are approachable, and they really care.

If you contact our office, you’ll speak with one of our fantastic support staff to make an appointment.  You will need to give your name and the name of your former partner. We will let you know that what we talk about is and will remain confidential.  Trust and discretion are integral to our ongoing working relationship.

The first appointment: what to expect

Next, we meet!  We can do this by phone, zoom or in person.  We might ask you to fill out an information sheet at or before this meeting so we have all the information we need to be able to help you. When we meet, what we will do first is talk about you.  What is the history of your relationship and family life?  How has your family parented your children and grown your finances?  Who made what contributions?  Some of our clients find this easy.  Some of our clients find this confronting.  It can be emotional to talk this through.  But we are here in this conversation with you and we are here to help.  There is no right or wrong way.  We will ask you questions… but most importantly, we will listen to you.

What we have found in working with separating clients over many years is that one of the best things we can do is listen.  You deserve to feel heard.  Your vulnerability, your distress or how you feel wronged is part of what you may want to address.  Listening is essential to being a great family lawyer (lawyers are generally fond of talking, after all) and it means we are learning.  Learning about you helps us tailor a plan for your new life that moves you forward.

Sometimes our clients know what they want to achieve and we assist them to realize that outcome.  Sometimes our clients feel lost and uncertain and we assist in advising about the options and developing a plan for action.

You might want to bring some of your financial documents to our appointment or you might not know what documents to gather.  Or you might prefer to meet us before providing sensitive and specific information.  We are happy to work with you and your preferences.

By the end of our first appointment we will have talked with you about the process that fits your situation.  You will have heard us say, “property settlement”, “parenting arrangements” and “separation and divorce”.  We will discuss what these phases mean for you.  We will explore what the property settlement process involves and what the possibilities are in relation to future parenting arrangements.  We will have provided you with information about costs.

Where you feel confident about moving forward, we will have spoken with you about the information that will be needed to do that.  Often that information will revolve around financial documents relevant to your assets, income and finances.  Again, some clients feel confident in their knowledge about their joint financial position and we can discuss asset holdings, particularly around business and farming ownership.  Some clients feel less knowledgeable so we will discuss how to obtain the information we need to empower and advance their position.

Potential pathways forward

The pathway we discuss might centre around negotiation and agreement.  This pathway is often a good fit where clients have separated amicably or where clients want a prompt resolution of their family law issues.  The result can be a legally binding settlement made by agreement, with no court hearings required.

Alternatively, the pathway we discuss might require protection and initiating a court process.  This can be appropriate where the other party is acting in a way that undermines your joint financial standing or where the existing situation needs to be preserved before property settlement can commence.  Similarly, children might require the protection of court orders to ensure their safety or to preserve their ongoing relationship with you.  The family law court system can be complex but with our assistance, it can be a place where we guide you through to your preferred outcome.

What next?

After our appointment, you might feel a bit drained, together with a side of information-overload.  You will have time to think about what we have discussed.  You can consider if you want us to work together -it is important that you are comfortable and confident with the lawyer you choose to work with. If you felt that with us at TGB, then you can review the strategy and approach you would like to adopt.

It is important to know that you set the priorities and the pathway.  We are here to work together with you, to provide guidance, options, advice and expertise.

Once you have reviewed our first appointment, you might be ready for the next step. If this sounds too simple, well, that’s our job.  To deal with the legal complexities and work collaboratively with you to share information, determine options and help you move into the next phase of your life.  We encourage you to come in for that first appointment and to start your new life.

Get in touch

If you are going through a relationship breakdown, we can help guide you through the confusion and onto a path of clarity, wellbeing and a fresh start.

Contact a member of our friendly Family Law team to take that first step!

Call us at our office closest to you, send us some information via our free family law online tool, or get in touch with us online, and one of our team will get back to you.

The author of this blog, Carissa Miller, is a family lawyer at TGB Lawyers and is based in Port Lincoln. She can be contacted on (08) 8682 1488 or via email cmiller@tgb.com.au.